Phuong's LJ - Wingmen

Wingmen

May. 6th, 2008 at 10:57 PM

Just out of curiosity, I want to know more about wingmen. I mean,I know that they can be there to help with the "divide and conquer" strategy. But is there something else they do?

Also, I'm seeing this thing in Craigslist where guys are asking for female wingmen. What? What exactly do female wingmen (wingladies?) do? Or are those posters just finding a subtle way to post for a date in the platonic section?

I have a lot of single male friends, and if I could help them out by being a winglady for them, I totally would.

Mood: curious

Comments

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twitch115 wrote:

May. 7th, 2008 06:12 am (UTC)

Actually it isn't all that uncommon. A good winglady can be a great deal more effective than a wingman if only because other women see that another female is friends with him. She can put them at ease where another guy might make her defensive. I'm sure there's a bit more to it than just that, but I haven't personally had a chance to try it for myself yet.

I've even heard of services in major cities offering professionals who will do this for guys who have serious trouble meeting, or even approaching, women.

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twitch115 wrote:

May. 7th, 2008 06:58 am (UTC)

In my haste I seem to have forgotten to mention some of the common functions of wingmen.

The wingman motivates the pilot to be social and practice approaching women. He helps the pilot approach pairs and groups of women without the awkwardness of being alone. ~~He will sometimes take the less attractive woman of a pair so that the pilot can get the more attractive without interruption.~~ Other responsibilities include remembering details (i.e. target's names and personal information) as well as compensating for intoxication in the judgment of the pilot. ~Wikipedia

Often, the wingman will be the first to approach a group (perhaps while the 'pilot' is otherwise occupied) in such a way that his friend can approach with relative ease and comfort. After that, there's the question of keeping him from making himself look bad and keeping the conversation flowing amiably.

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ilubmoney wrote:

May. 8th, 2008 01:46 am (UTC)

I get that they're there to make it easier for the "pilot" to attain his target. I guess what I'm really wondering is: what do successful wingmen do exactly? What do they say to the girls to put them at ease? Etc.

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twitch115 wrote:

May. 8th, 2008 03:00 am (UTC)

How would you start a conversation with anyone you didn't already know?

One of the easiest ways to go about it would be to bring someone into an existing conversation while keeping it light and friendly. Just ask for someone's opinion on something and strike up a conversation from there. This article explains it fairly well and also links to other potentially useful articles.

I would give you pickup lines if I thought they had a substantial chance of success, but they tend to be fairly transparent the vast majority of the time. Thus, they tend to work only when the girl in question is already interested.

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badm0j0 wrote:

May. 7th, 2008 07:36 am (UTC)

wingman.. navigator.. bombardier... i think i can link this to discussions said elsewhere where MEN dont even KNOW the subtle flirt tactics... say if a waitress were fawning all over some male customer, that male customer might not even see it. the FEMALE wingman can point that out, and relay that information to us directly. Not only that, they can totally give us inside information on what to say, what to do, and can even bail us out when we screw THAT portion up.

I definately could stand one myself. Im clueless.

As far as craigslist, sure.. they may want one too- but cmon... you know they will take a shot at ya. For sure a few "test flirts" will be made at the very least. Or they will kill you and stuff you in a bag, you really never know with craigslist.

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lehah wrote:

May. 7th, 2008 10:25 am (UTC)

You can't fault men for not picking up on subtle hints. After all, its a pride thing - if you have something to sell, you shouldn't be subtle.

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ilubmoney wrote:

May. 8th, 2008 01:50 am (UTC)

I think when it comes to dating and a lot of other areas, women in general have more to lose by being too direct. When we try to be assertive, sometimes it comes off as being too aggressive. I wish it didn't have to be that way and that we don't always have to be subtle with these things, but that's the nature of the game.

Edited at 2008-05-08 01:50 am (UTC)

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